Watch out, it gets stale

06 Nov, 2020 - 00:11 0 Views
Watch out, it gets stale


Nhlalwenhle Ncube


It’s very common for people in a long-term relationship to feel that the spark is lost. This is probably because once time passes, people naturally settle down. They become used to the environment and the people around them which makes it not exciting anymore. Getting used to anything becomes boring and there will eventually be change of behaviour and one stops doing the things he used to do previously.

The same happens in relationships, everything just becomes a sort of routine. It’s not that you hate or no longer love him, it’s just that you know that at the end of the day he will be there. You don’t have to work to keep him round anymore and he is not your priority any more.

You cannot find as much time for him as you used to. It’s understandable that you are at a point where you no longer need to go out of your way to prove your love, but that doesn’t mean you start to completely neglect each other, it means you should do exactly what you feel like you don’t have to.

After all, if you continue to treat your partner like you did at the beginning of your relationship, you would not feel like your relationship is coming to an end. Love is what brought you two together and at the end of the day, it is the very same thing that’s going to keep you two together. You have to remember what made your relationship possible and begin to build up again.

A sad, universal truth is that every relationship will hit a point when the fiery excitement of the beginning fades and things feel a little boring. Your brain and body simply cannot sustain the adrenaline-fuelled butterfly feeling for years and years. But losing the lustre does not mean you are destined for misery; you can fall back in love again.

Think about it, when two people first get together, they put a lot of effort and energy into making their partner happy and their twosome flourish. You have to act responsible as falling in love or back in it is an intentional act. And while no one can make things perfect, you can definitely do your part to refresh your relationship when things go meh.

Do something to make your partner’s life better. Love is a verb, when you lead with action, your heart tends to follow. Always act loving and sexy to remind your brain that this person is important. When two people feel their relationship has gone stale, they should really put effort to revive it.

Even if you have hit rock bottom, take out time to bring back the spark. Take some time to make what was once the most exciting part of your day, exciting again. Make love to get love back! One of the simplest and most effective ways to reconnect with your partner is through sex. It is intimate and fulfilling in so many ways. It’s vital to a relationship. It builds a sense of security and trust. You could be reminded of your first time together and what it felt like.

The rush and anticipation might all come back to you. All you might have been holding in could find a way out. You may be tired at the end of the day; it might have been a hard day at work but spare a day in a week just for some physical affection. It will do you good, you will probably stress out less, be able to get rid of stress and you and your partner will feel young again. Your story will change, it won’t be you just having to go home, it will be you wanting to go home.

Physical affection is not just physical, the thought of someone can commence a series of reactions in one’s brain.

Women are actually known to release a chemical upon big O, relief which makes them fall in love even more with their partner. It could be euphoric so don’t give up or pass up on an opportunity.

Physical intimacy is just as important as a bond. You will be surprised at what your partner would be willing to do for you, out of sheer love. There will intimacy that makes you feel in awe of one another and makes your bond stronger, it’s a blanket of security for you and your partner.

Also remember to love yourself, only then will you be capable of loving them and being loved. That does not mean you forget about your surroundings altogether and just focus on yourself but you should focus on yourself enough.

This affects a lot of married women as they stop loving and taking care of themselves.

Watch your health and practice hygiene. Keep your body in a condition that makes you feel confident and makes your partner lust over you. If you feel good, everything feels better. Keep fit and make yourself attractive for them. I know a lot of people will say he should love me the way I am.

However, if you try just for him not because you have to but because you want to, he will want to do the same and the end result will be two beautiful people who not only attract each other via personality and character but also attract each other physically. And when you are content, you are more caring on other people. If you keep thinking about yourself and how you do not appreciate yourself, you will take it out on others.

That will only lead to unnecessary misunderstanding that may affect your relationship entirely. If you aren’t giving yourself enough time, you are constantly distracted and feel unfulfilled regardless of how your partner is treating you. You might be irritated even by their mere presence just because you are not at peace with yourself, again you will take any anger and hurt that you have towards yourself at your partner, hurting them along the way. This could place them in a state of confusion. They may simply think that you are just not attracted to them anymore and that can be super discouraging. They might be doing everything right, yet you would react in an unexpected manner.

He buys you a dress and it just doesn’t fit right and then you don’t appreciate them enough and it’s all just a big mess. Eventually they would stop trying and distance themselves from you.

Do all you can to naturally rid yourself of your insecurities and that will be enough for you to allow your partner to be able to get close enough to get rid of all the others.

Look at old pictures and remember what you used to be like together. The more you remember the past, the more you would want to re-enact it. Memories of the rush will make you want it back and you will at least try to bring back charms in your relationship. Not only the happy memories but even the ones about trying times remind you of how you have come a long way to where you are today, just remembering how you loved him so much then that leaving at that time was something you couldn’t even have imagined.

It will make you realise that you didn’t just try all that time simply for laughs and if you worked so hard then you will feel like trying to make it work even more now. If it was worth it then, it’s worth it now as well. And there’s nothing you two can’t survive, as long as you are in it together. Maybe do some of the things you did when you started going out and you will see the magic return in no time! Remember how you used to flirt.

It might sound silly but works like a charm.

Flirting elevates your mood, relieves the stress and eases things between the two of you. It’s refreshing and encouraging. And they will probably make you feel the same way. If you go out of your way to buy them flowers and to give them random kisses just as a show of innocent affection chances are, they will reciprocate your actions and it will be bliss.

Don’t be shy to show affection.

Try a little something new in bed, try weird food combinations. It may all seem silly but these are all opportunities to discover one another and even yourself. It will be a path to finding out new things about one another. You’ll realise more and more of each other’s likes and dislikes and it will be a new realisation. Trying something new is just an easy way to figure each other out more.

Start doing things right. Don’t just assume that he is always going to be by your side regardless of what you do and don’t do. If you want to stay together, you have to work for it. He should not be with you out of obligation, rather out of love. So, make him feel loved. Show him what he means to you. Make time for each other every single day. Profess your undying love and then prove it too.

Your partner is not your pet or an object that you can play around with when you want to and leave behind when you don’t want to. A human being has feelings and emotions, can transform from love to hate and from pain to pleasure within only a few moments. Don’t give your partner the chance to even doubt your love for them.

If you are feeling something missing in the relationship, you need to let your partner know. He might be noticing the same and even if he is not, he needs to know.

This would keep you from blaming your partner for being inconsiderate of your feelings. And the sooner it’s out in the open, the sooner you can fix it. If he is sensitive to you mentioning it they need some time. Your feelings matter and so does your mental well-being. If they can’t even listen to a request without being unnecessarily sensitive over it, they probably place their feelings first over yours. Make him understand and have an open conversation and help each other out.

If you feel like the intimacy is dead, tell him so that both of you can work on it and you can become better suited as relationship partners. This is your person; you can trust him and hence it should not be a problem simply mentioning some parts of the relationship you could work on. Communication is key. If you know his past you need to keep it exciting by talking about your now. Talk about your feelings.

No, it does not make you any less of a real woman.

Relationships are fragile, no matter how long it has been. The slightest mistake could damage what you have been working for all along. Even if you feel something missing, you can always bring it back. There are very few mistakes that could be considered unforgivable. If you fight for something it will feel great without a doubt.

So, stay loyal, stay faithful, don’t make up misunderstandings and don’t give them a chance either. Love him so much that he gets consumed by the love. With all this, the relationship will not go stale.

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