B-Metro
Charity Mathema
From time immemorial, the issue of infidelity has been a source of concern to married couples, with it leading to the collapse of marriages and relationships.
Nowadays many couples face troubles in their relationships that causes them to end a marriage in divorce as young ladies also appear to be ignoring willing young men to jostle over married men.
But to end a relationship because you feel that your partner isn’t as attractive physically any longer is ghastly.
Everyone gets older, and your looks too will fade.
A 65-year-old man from New Magwegwe suburb in Bulawayo left residents in his suburb shocked when he decided to end his marriage of 30 years and begin another relationship with a younger and more attractive, 19-year-old woman popularly known as Ama2k.
Ama2k is a colloquial name for a generation of youths who were born on or after the year 2000.
According to him, the younger woman not only performs better in bed but also embraces sexual positions which he likes and also engages in activities such as oral sex, which he said his ex-wife considered sinful.
But, what he failed to realise is that looks are fleeting and no one stays young forever.
The above case is not exceptional as it is a reflection of what is happening in our society where older men prefer to date women who are younger to them regardless of their own age.
The case also sparks a broader conversation about the importance of sexual compatibility and open communication within relationships and marriages.
According to research, it is a popular belief that older men prefer to date women who are younger to them so that they can be reminded of their own sweet time of youth.
There are also other beliefs that if an older man is dating a younger woman, he may be going through a midlife crisis and hence in order to feel good, they date someone who has a more fresh approach to life.
Explaining what makes older, married men attractive to young women or vice versa Zion Church Pastor Matshinda Moyo who is also a South Africa-based Zimbabwean counsellor, said couples should feel comfortable discussing their desires and boundaries, including engaging in sexual acts such as oral sex and trying new positions.
He emphasised the importance of sexual exploration and open communication within a committed partnership.
“I love teaching new couples about the importance of intimacy that when a man is now fully prepared for a married life, they should know that before they indulge, they need to ask each other what they enjoy during sex.
“Women must be made satisfied in bed such that even on the next morning they wake up singing joyful songs while sweeping the yard.
“It doesn’t end there, women must also do the same to satisfy the man. The reason why most men prefer Ama2k is because they easily learn and adapt faster to what the man wants in bed, which is why you find a father of five leaving his family because Ama2k does the unthinkable in bed causing these married men to lose their senses,” said Moyo.
This revelation has helped shed light on the significance of sexual compatibility within a relationship.
While it is essential to acknowledge that sexual preferences and desires can vary greatly between individuals, it is equally important for couples to engage in open and honest conversations about their needs and boundaries.
To provide a balanced view, B-Metro also spoke to a married couple, Sihle and Mehluli Tshuma who have been together for over 20 years.
Mehluli expresses a desire to explore new experiences within a relationship.
“I think it’s important for couples to have open conversations about their sexual desires. It’s about finding a balance that respects both partner’s boundaries while still exploring new experiences together,” said Mehluli.
Sihle however, believes that sexual acts such as oral sex and certain positions were sinful and should be avoided.
“I believe that our love and commitment should be expressed in a way that aligns with our religious beliefs. While we may not engage in certain sexual acts, we find other ways to connect and show our love for each other,” she said.
Research has also shown that many women ignorantly push their husbands into relationships with young ladies by not being romantic, seductive and giving up on many things that attracted their husbands to them in their younger days “on the excuse that they are responsibly married and bearing children”.
A young man Kwanele Mpofu in his late 20’s emphasizes the importance of communication and hygiene.
He said before couples engage in sexual activities they must make sure that they have taken their bath so they may not turn the other off with a bad odour.
On why is the trend changing where young girls wish to date older, married men instead of young men, Kwanele said: “These young men don’t tolerate certain things tolerated by the older and married men. These older, married men are also caring and will do what it takes to keep the relationship working. These are some of the guaranteed reasons why Ama2K falls in love with older men”.
While differing opinions exist, it is clear that fostering an environment of trust and understanding is crucial for couples to navigate their sexual desires and boundaries successfully.
As society continues to evolve, it is essential for individuals and couples to engage in open conversations about their sexual needs, ensuring that both partners feel heard, respected, and fulfilled in their intimate relationship.
